Excepting abuse or addiction, the vast majority of couples’ difficulties with one another are two-sided.
Partners typically come into therapy well-armed with anecdotes and lists of grievances about each other, but rarely with insights into how their own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors need to change to make their relationship grow. But lasting solutions emerge from the inside out—self-focus is the key.
For example, “Jillian” reports:
“I have been trying to make this relationship better but I cannot seem to make anything work. I know that what I am doing is in the best interest of the relationship but my partner is not doing their part. I would take responsibility for my part in the problems if I felt I was at fault. The thing is, I don’t. I can’t be critical of myself for being disappointed in what my partner hasn’t been able to do! That wouldn’t make any sense.”
What should she do? Click here to read the full post on www.psychologytoday.com.